Till debt do us part

Managing money can be one of the most difficult topics to discuss with your partner. Life coaches share how to get on the same page about your finances

If the recent reports are to be believed, reality TV star Kylie Jenner is broke after making foolish money mistakes — instances which involved funding her boyfriend Tyga’s lifestyle. The relationship proved to be a financial drain as she spent almost $2 million on him. To make matters worse, Tyga assumed that her money was a gift, and hence refused to cough it up. Kylie and Tyga’s situation is something that every couple will face at a point in their relationship since discussions around money isn’t exactly a dinner table conversation. Life coaches say that having “the talk” about financial goals and beliefs ensures that money doesn’t prove to be a relationship wrecker. Relationship expert Seema Hingorany observes, “You don’t want money to create a wedge in your relationship. Financial issues do come with emotional baggage at times. This makes it more important to be transparent.”

Define financial goals Life coach Anand Chulani says, “Talking about your spending habits may not come easily, even if you believe in money management.” He suggests that understanding each other’s ideas about finances will help ensure that both the partners are on the same page. He says, “Define your financial goals — understanding each other’s perspective of money, savings, financial freedom. Once you know each other’s financial expectations, work towards these goals.”

Make sure you are equal partners Life coach Chetna Mehrotra says that it helps if both partners are actively involved in managing money, since it will help avoid any future arguments. She says, “It makes sense to share the financial responsibilities and contribute equally to the household. However, if you have no trust in each other’s financial wisdom, it is better to keep the money separate.”

Plan for the future Don’t just talk about spending. Lifestyle coach Bina Jhaveri says that making an attempt to understand each other’s long-term, investment goals and even financial independence will help couples plan for the future. She says, “Don’t assume that since you are dating, you are the others’ financial obligation. Just like you would share other responsibilities equally, finances should not become an individual’s burden. It helps to have a balanced approach. If the guy funds an all-expense trip, could reciprocate by doing something similar.”

How should debt be dealt with Until the couple is married, there is no reason why one’s income or debt should become the other’s. Helping each other out in times should always remain a personal choice and not an obligation or demand. Even after marriage, many couples choose to keep their financial matters separate. It allows them to focus on other aspects of their relationship and not get bogged down with financial issues.