I have made it on my own: Esha Gupta

...says Esha Gupta, as she speaks about her journey as an actress and how the industry can be tough on budding artistes with no connections to stars.

It is a constant challenge to keep in shape and look gorgeous because you never know when you will have to be ready for your next project, says Bollywood actress Esha Gupta, whose recently released film Rustom touched 100 crore at the box office. “I have been waiting for the right kind of movies to come along. To grow and move ahead, I worked hard on myself and my art,” she says. “The smallest things, like if your skin isn’t good, or if you have grown fat, can affect your chances. You think that you will get back in shape when you get an offer, but what if someone calls you and says they have to go on floors in two weeks,” she adds.

To ensure that she never misses a chance, the actress follows a strict routine to keep in top form. “The days I am free, I usually sleep as I don’t get a lot of sleep otherwise. It’s not like insomnia, but I wake up at the smallest sound. Other than that, I go for my dance classes, Pilates, and I watch every film possible, if I am not travelling at the time. I would rather do that than step out for parties.”

Ask her about her rare appearances in industry parties and she says, “I realised that in this industry, to get work, you have to go out for parties. Why would I want to party otherwise when I can just be at home with my close friends and watch TV I have always been a homebody. Unless it’s an official event, you will never see me being clicked at parties. During Diwali parties in the industry, I am in and out within 30 minutes. I don’t even drink and there is no alcohol in my house.”

Esha got a dream debut with the Bhatts in Jannat and later starred Prakash Jha’s Chakravyuh. However, the actress feels as though her career lost steam somewhere and is once again regaining its momentum with Rustom. She says, “Not everyone gets a chance and I got lucky with my break, but I don’t think luck was with me later on. My first year was fab, so was my second, and then suddenly, there was a downfall and my other movies got lot of negative reviews. Unfortunately, I was starting to get offers for B-grade movies, which offered a lot of money but had no name. If I want to grow, I have to be focussed.” Esha remembers how she dealt with the tough times. “There were days I have woken up and said ‘let me give up’. But I have too much of a self-respect to do that. I am the strongest in my family but there were days when I cried. You don’t want to go back to your family and tell them that you can’t do it.”

Bollywood is a fragile industry with dreams crashing every Friday, and while there are downsides to it, Esha has always managed to stay put with her head held high. Talking about the limitations for an artist in the industry, she says, “There is a lot of nepotism. The industry wants to pull you down, they don’t want you to succeed. You do one thing and you are stereotyped. You say anything wrong and no one in the industry will stand by your side. They would definitely stand by a star kid. If you don’t have films, no one would want to invest in you, but a star kid will be launched in a big way. You either compromise your career or your personal life to get where you want to be. For me, I wasn’t ready to compromise either. I know that there are rumours about me, but if they were true, I wouldn’t have had to wait this long for the right film. My dad told me ‘you do whatever you want to do in life, be a chef, be a housewife, sit at home, but just remember, everyday when you look yourself in the mirror, you shou d be proud of yourself. Don’t have any regrets’.”

Humshakals almost ruined the careers of all the actors involved but Esha has no regrets. She explains, “Even if it didn’t do well, I liked it and have no regrets. Uss time har ek ki kismat kharab thi toh woh chali nahi (It was just everyone’s bad luck that the movie didn’t do well). It did give me a jolt and I didn’t get good films after that until Rustom. I am very proud of the movie.”

The actress remembers how she struggled to stay motivated through her career, “I didn’t lose my confidence. When you keep working on yourself and you still don’t get a film that’s the time you feel ‘I should just give up’. But it’s my ego that prevented me from doing so.”