The D-word

Marriage was once the literal living out of the statement, till death do us part. Today, people leave relationships in such a battered state, mostly mentally and sometimes also physically, sadly, that death seems like a sweeter option.

And no matter how hard we try, the balance will be found. Whenever the law favours one side of the settlement, there will always be someone who takes undue advantage of it. If it isn’t a man who gets away with being abusive and dictatorial, it can be a woman who goes after his money and property. Without commenting on who is right (for every case will have its own merits, its own course of justice) there is always someone who stands to benefit and given the right mix of intent, time, greed, and a lawyer might just exploit it.

Which is why today I am proposing the notion of divorce insurance. It is like a prenuptial but instead of making your partner sign it and casting a bad shadow over your togetherness before it has even begun, people can safely take out a D-insurance on their own without ever hurting the feelings of their partner. The bank that they transact with could lay down the rules and decide the premium accordingly but in case of a nasty split said financial institution would bear all related costs and expenditures, from the cases to the settlement amount.

I think there is a market for this. I’d much rather listen to a tele-caller explain me this rather than trying to interest me in an unsecured loan I don’t want or property off a state highway that is currently only a state of mind (both property and highway).

With ‘D-insurance’ not only would you feel secure about any untoward incidents, you’d first and foremost feel safer in your commitment. Taking the material worries out of the equation would make it more about the emotion and the passion. Or so one hopes.

Mind you, it won’t come cheap, this sense of security. It would take into account all your wealth that stands at risk and also if you have had a string of divorces or breakups. All such assets and trends would work their way into the final premium amount that you would be required to pay. But, rather than ask your partner to sign a pre-nup (which, by the way, isn’t worth the paper it is typed on) this would avoid all such awkwardness.

If you agree with me and you happen to work in a bank in a position where shots are called, your politeness would keep you from forgetting to thank me for this idea. I don’t want any money for it but maybe you can name it after me. The ‘Magan Carta’ wouldn’t be too far-fetched solipsistic I believe.

The writer is a lover of wine, song and everything fine.