‘Husband bashing’ on the rise in Uttar Pradesh

Lucknow: Women, as victims of domestic violence, are a common phenomenon. In Gonda district in Uttar Pradesh, it is now men who are ending up as victims of physical violence at the hands of their wives.

“We are receiving about ten complaints every month from married men who have faced physical abuse from their wives. These complaints are coming on the Dial 100 emergency service,” said a station officer, Radhey Shyam Maurya.

The police normally include these complaints in the domestic violence column and, hence, the fact that victims are now men is not being widely publicised. It is commonly believed that victims of domestic violence are only women.

“It was only when we made a new column where complaints of men were registered that we realised that this trend is on the rise,” the police officer said.

According to a senior police officer, men have been approaching the police with cases where the wives have mentally and physically tortured them. “But majority of them do not want to lodge FIRs because their own image would take a beating and they do not wish to be ridiculed by their peers. They request us to threaten their wives with dire consequences so that their suffering comes to an end,” he disclosed.

In Lucknow, the Pati Parivar Kalyan Samiti has been set up mainly to deal with issues related to battered husband.

“It is a misnomer that women are victims in families. The era of joint families is over and women are now financially independent. There is a strong pro-women bias in administration and police and men are reluctant to present themselves as victims. It is this that is leading to a rapid increase in male suicide cases,” said  Indu Subhash , who heads the Samiti.

A member of the Samiti, who has spent five months in jail on false dowry charges, said “My wife would demand money at frequent intervals and when I questioned her, she slapped dowry harassment charges against me.” In jail, he found a 90-year-old man who was imprisoned on dowry charges by his daughter-in-law.

“The old man could neither walk, nor see nor hear but the police believed that he was demanding money from his daughter-in-law,” he said. As per body, in Lucknow, dowry harassment cases have been filed against 70 doctors and 4 university professors in the past few months.

The Samiti , apart from extending helping hand to husbands in distress, has also sent a memorandum to the President of India , demanding that a Men’s Commission be set up on the pattern of the Women’s Commission.

“The problem is not one to be laughed out at. The situation could turn volatile if we continue to take a lop-sided view”, said Indu Subhash. And coming from a woman this does require serious thinking.