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Public display of angst

Airing one's dirty linen has become common amongst warring couples.

When relationships go sour, is shaming your better-half publicly the best way forward? Some celebrities sure think so. With Indian bowler Mohammed Shami and his wife Hasin Jahan as the recent topic of discussion, we explore this inherent need to air dirty linen in public. The Indian fast bowler was allegedly accused of rape, extra-marital affairs, domestic violence, etc. In earlier instances, actress Preity Zinta took to Facebook when former beau Ness Wadia abused her during a cricket match. Her’s was a post explaining her stand and why she decided to take the case to the cops. The spat turned ugly when camps supporting her or Ness took to Facebook to defend them. Sandalwood actress Hitha Chandrashekar does not believe in this public display of aggression, “I don’t agree with it. At the end of the day, all of us are human. If a person makes a mistake, there is no guarantee that the other person won’t make one. I appreciate the way Beyonce and Jay Z dealt with their problems, and tried to work things through.

Hitha ChandrashekarHitha Chandrashekar

I am old school as I was brought up in a family where people have had their set of problems but never aired it in public. No relationship is perfect. Even with a platform like social media to express one’s angst, it doesn’t mean that you can shame somebody who has been an important part of your life. You should deal with it within closed doors. Such matters should not be made public as you don’t know when it will come back to hit you in the face. It’s human to err and I think it’s best personal angst is dealt in private. Talking to a counsellor will give one a fresh perspective.”

In some cases, when celebrities turn to media, it is usually publicity-seeking. Psychologist Aishwarya Honnavalli avers, “When there is an issue in a relationship, the best thing to do would be to sort it out like mature adults as opposed to involving the whole country and making a huge spectacle of it. It would hurt the person’s public image. Non-famous spouses or partners, try to cash in on their famous better halves.” Such news diverts attention away from news that is important. She further adds, “The country doesn’t need to know about celebrities and their relationships.”

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