Many of us have encountered a friend who has push the boundaries with her brutal honesty, especially when you’re not ready to hear it. According to research published in Psychological Science, friends like this may sometimes cause you “negative emotional experiences that they believe would ultimately help” in the long run, simply because they care enough to point out the truth to you. There is nothing pleasant about being at the receiving end of criticism as Huda Zama, a commerce student says, “Some people are more straightforward and blatant about how they feel. A friend once told me I was very egoistic and I over think everything. I refuted it at first but I went back home and actually thought about it, and came to terms with what the person had said. It does makes you a better person as these people with their honest criticism encourage you to look at your flaws and contemplate about it.”
Bonds grow a lot stronger who you are upfront and honest with each other. Swetha Venkiteswaran, a theatre artiste says, “This happened a lot times with my best friend when she told me stuff that I was not ready to hear. She came into the picture at the right time, and made sure that I don’t waver from the right path or lose out an opportunity to do the correct thing. Our relationship has grown stronger from this as we have grown to be more accepting each other” It is also important to draw the line with certain people, as they may do more harm than good. Rebekah Mathew an international studies student adds, “There is a thin line between being honest and just plain mean. It is important to establish boundaries if you think someone is overdoing it with the “help” as you can get carried away by what they say. You don’t have to believe everything that a friend says. Even if you may be a little defensive you should be able to see the facts for yourself.”
It takes a lot of guts to be the person with the opinion as city-based psychologist Sruthi Vincent gives us her spin on why certain individuals take the burden of having to dole out the harsh truth. “Whether such people really care, largely depends on their relationship with you. Your classmate saying that you have a bad sense of style and your best friend saying such a thing, can be interpreted in completely different ways. Also, it could be that they have an assertive personality and are likely to be honest without giving it a second thought because they are just staying true to their personality,” she says.
