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Love dilemma of an Indian man

When Indian television opened up to what one could call “modern programming” in the early ‘90s, hit television show, Bakra, had audiences glued to their screens.

When Indian television opened up to what one could call “modern programming” in the early ‘90s, hit television show, Bakra, had audiences glued to their screens. They were entertained not just by the silly pranks that the show pulled on unsuspecting public, but more so by the host of the show — Cyrus Broacha.

Fast forward two decades, and the comedian is now one of India’s most recognisable and funniest stand-up acts in the industry. With two books already to his name, Cyrus’ third — 23 Ways To Make A Girl Fall For You — follows up on his quest to dissect the Indian male’s social characteristics.

“I did a show once called Love Line where we took questions from all around the country, and there were a lot of generic questions that came up regarding the Indian male and his lack of romantic prowess, poor game and how his strategy is not sound. The reason being, going back to the demographics of India and how across communities, classes and economic strata, the Indian male is treated like a God. He’s completely out of sync because of his false expectations about his greatness,” says Cyrus, as he goes on to explain that his book delves into commonplace social situations that Indian men find themselves in with women.

“It’s painful to see that the Indian male needs help, he’s a troubled man. He either overshoots, does everything in a large way and makes the girl feel awkward; or he really has no idea where to start — simple things like communication, even making that small introduction is a huge issue. Some of them have told me that they’re madly in love with this girl, she’s the prettiest girl ever, she likes this, her hobbies are that, she goes here... and in the end, they say the girl doesn’t know me because we’ve never met, I’ve never spoken to her,” he explains.

Born and raised in Mumbai, Cyrus studied law at Government Law College in Mumbai, but his interests always lay in theatre and the creative arts. In 1993, Cyrus was hustling between college from 6 am to 9 am and then onto his copywriting job at an ad firm five minutes away, all the while juggling theatre and an FM radio RJing gig — no mean feat. But being picked up by MTV changed all that.

“For the first couple of years with the channel, it was like I can do whatever I want, but I could always fall back on law. But then I started earning more money,” Cyrus says, adding, “I had met a Major in the army, who was 44 years old (which is how old I am now) and studying at KC Law college. And I’m like, this guy’s got two kids and he’s still here now studying law. So I thought — ‘okay I could maybe fall back on this later too.’”

The decision worked out well for Cyrus, and after working there for over a decade, he finally left the network in 2008. Since then, Cyrus has gone on to create television shows such as The Week That Wasn’t, a political satire show, and even has a theatre show 40 Shades of Grey (Hair) running. That, along with a radio gig in Hindi... Cyrus is still hustling.

“Unlike film stars, who can do one film, and then rest for six months, we have to work. We’re the prostitutes of this market, taking up whatever comes our way,” he says, adding that the Internet isn’t as great a tool for proliferating comedy as it may seem. Cyrus says, “We’ve also tried to do stuff online, but we land up paying for our own taxis to get to the studios. A lot of comedians of today, the younger ones, I just hope they have money. They have work, but it’s not paying that much. Everyone has to figure out how to earn their money. Or marry the right person. Or die young with a good insurance scheme!” he adds with a laugh.

With the Internet has come competition and proliferation, Cyrus admits, and the veteran says he’s glad he didn’t have to start his career in today’s world. He explains, “Back then people were so serious, if you did anything that was halfway silly or naughty, you would stand out. Every audition I went to, everyone was so serious. There were all these good looking, young guys with six pack abs and nothing to say. Now, there are so many comedians out there, I would ban comedy!”

But he adds that the comedy scene has changed for the better, even if he doesn’t believe he’s not at the peak of his career right now. “The pinnacle is Kapil Sharma who’s earning '20 crore a year! You can ask my accountant, we’re nowhere close. I think you need to be on a Hindi channel to make serious money. But the good thing is we’re the generation that’s learning what’s happening. The next generation will know what’s happening. We’re pioneers,” Cyrus says.

Cyrus jokes about how his next book will be about Mumbai and the civic amenities of the Indian urban experience — “I will die in traffic,” he says — but wants to pursue his Indian male theory for his next, as well.

And with a wife and two kids, Cyrus says his career is anything but slowing down. “I have two kids, which are mine, and a few more, which I don’t know about. I have to work harder and faster to pay their bills! I wish I could slow down. Let me tell you something though, if I find a mic somewhere, I will talk. I’d rather do five jokes in a bar with five friends, which would be more fun, but you know how it is.”

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